We all saw this one coming. Someone was bound to make a film about India’s extraordinary Mars Orbiter Mission a.k.a. Mangalyaan, a momentous event that established the Indian Space Research Organization as a serious contender in the world for the advancement of science and technology.
What we didn’t expect though was that former Bollywood boytoy, Imran Khan, whose day job has been in the shitter for the past five years, would be the one directing the film.
Four days ago, our expectations manifested themselves in the limp YouTube short film, Mission Mars: Keep Walking India, a film that, unlike the rocket it’s about, doesn’t soar but rather schleps around for twenty minutes looking for a purpose.
“A film about a moment in history that is a great source of pride for all Indians could have easily gone viral, but as a consequeunce of Khan’s callow hands, it’ll likely sink without a trace.”
This is mostly due to the fact that the film is bursting at the seams with way too many characters and subplots. Most short films zero in on two, possibly three characters and one central plot line, but this is Khan’s directorial debut so, naturally, he acts like an overeager freshman film school student and shoots for grandiloquence. As such, the film ends up being a pompous, overproduced attempt at something Sorkin-ian.
Yes, characteristic of the American auteur’s work that Khan is so desperately trying to ape here, Mission Mars has a lot of scenes with characters walking from one room to the next while talking about very, very serious and important stuff that’ll fly over most civilians’ heads. And the only reason why we know what they’re talking about is very, very serious and very, very important is because of the overly dramatic music playing in the background.
The glaring difference between Sorkin’s work and this, is that Sorkin makes feature films and TV series, not 20-minute YouTube short films which don’t afford us the time to invest in and understand a large cast and a dense story.
Simply put, with this hot mess of a film, you’ll not know who’s who or what the fuck is going on.
It’s really no wonder that this film hasn’t gone viral and probably never will. A film about a landmark event that is a great source of pride for all Indians the world over could have easily been the next big thing on WhatsApp but, as a consequence of Khan’s callow hands, it’ll likely sink without a trace.
